{"id":51643,"date":"2019-04-19T13:39:41","date_gmt":"2019-04-19T10:39:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/arantv.az\/?p=51643"},"modified":"2019-04-19T13:39:41","modified_gmt":"2019-04-19T10:39:41","slug":"kisil%c9%99r-qadinlari-gor%c9%99nd%c9%99-uf-bunu-n%c9%99-otel%c9%99-aparardim-dey%c9%99-dusunur-psixoloqdan-qalmaqalli-sozl%c9%99r","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/?p=51643","title":{"rendered":"“Ki\u015fil\u0259r qad\u0131nlar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 “uf, bunu n\u0259 otel\u0259 aparard\u0131m” dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr” \u2014 Psixoloqdan QALMAQALLI S\u00d6ZL\u018fR"},"content":{"rendered":"

Psixoloq Ayt\u0259n \u018fl\u0259kb\u0259rova Modern.az sayt\u0131na geni\u015f m\u00fcsahib\u0259 verib. ARANTV.AZ h\u0259min m\u00fcsahib\u0259ni oxuculara t\u0259qdim edir:\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Ayt\u0259n xan\u0131m, son g\u00fcnl\u0259rin \u0259n \u00e7ox m\u00fczakir\u0259 olunan m\u00f6vzular\u0131ndan biri intiharlard\u0131r.\u00a0 \u0130nsanlar\u0131 intiharlara s\u00fcr\u00fckl\u0259y\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r \u00e7oxdur. Zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259, texnologiya inki\u015faf etdikc\u0259, insanlar da sanki irad\u0259sizl\u0259\u015fir. Texnolji inki\u015faf\u0131n paralelind\u0259 bizi intihara t\u0259\u015fviq ed\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r n\u0259dir?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Haz\u0131rda s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259n \u0259sas\u0131 stressl\u0259rdir. Bu stressl\u0259rin i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 biz\u0259 dayanmadan t\u0259sir ed\u0259ni informativ stressl\u0259rdir. \u0130nformativ stressl\u0259rin yaranmas\u0131 insanlar\u0131 intihara apar\u0131r. \u0130ndi v\u0259ziyy\u0259t el\u0259dir ki, insanlar intiharla sanki “qa\u00e7d\u0131-tutdu” oynay\u0131rlar. B\u0259zil\u0259ri asanl\u0131qla tap\u0131lma\u011f\u0131, \u00f6l\u00fcml\u0259ri il\u0259 g\u00fcnd\u0259m\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259yi d\u0259 ist\u0259yirl\u0259r. \u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259nl\u0259r i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 kamillik d\u00f6vr\u00fcnd\u0259 olanlar da, cahill\u0259r d\u0259, yeniyetm\u0259l\u0259r d\u0259 var. Yeniyetm\u0259l\u0259r bizim \u0259n h\u0259ssas yerimizdir. \u0130ndi m\u0259kt\u0259b psixoloqlar\u0131 m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259 olacaq bir hadis\u0259ni ara\u015fd\u0131rmadan, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259y\u0259 s\u0259thi yana\u015f\u0131rlar. Bu, m\u0259ni \u00e7ox narahat edir.<\/p>\n

– \u0130ntiharda rol oynayan “aktyorlar” var – c\u0259miyy\u0259t, ail\u0259, yax\u0131n \u0259traf. Daha \u00e7ox hans\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 m\u0259suliyy\u0259t d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr?<\/strong><\/p>\n

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– \u018fsas m\u0259suliyy\u0259t valideynl\u0259rin \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Valideyn az da olsa, \u00f6z \u00f6vlad\u0131na qon\u015fu g\u00f6z\u00fc il\u0259 baxsa, \u00f6vlad\u0131n\u0131n s\u0259hvl\u0259rini daha ayd\u0131n sez\u0259 bil\u0259c\u0259k v\u0259 d\u00fcz yol g\u00f6st\u0259r\u0259c\u0259k. Y\u0259ni biz nec\u0259 ba\u015fqas\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6vlad\u0131na qon\u015fu g\u00f6z\u00fc il\u0259 bax\u0131r\u0131q, s\u0259hvl\u0259rini g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fck. Yox, \u0259g\u0259r s\u0259thi yana\u015f\u0131lsa, probleml\u0259r ortaya \u00e7\u0131xacaq.<\/p>\n

B\u0259z\u0259n d\u0259 olur ki, c\u0259miyy\u0259t i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 olan ail\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 d\u0259 probleml\u0259r \u00e7\u0131x\u0131r. Ayr\u0131-se\u00e7kilik v\u0259 valideynin “i\u015fim var, i\u015f\u0259 getm\u0259liy\u0259m” dey\u0259r\u0259k yana\u015fmas\u0131 u\u015faqlar\u0131n k\u0259narda qalmas\u0131na g\u0259tirib \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– M\u00fcasir d\u00f6vrd\u0259, \u00e7ox pul qazanmaq laz\u0131md\u0131r ki, valideynl\u0259r d\u0259 u\u015faqlar\u0131na daha yax\u015f\u0131 t\u0259hsil ver\u0259 bilsinl\u0259r. Pul qazan\u0131r\u0131q, amma onu da d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fcr\u00fck ki, u\u015fa\u011fa az vaxt ay\u0131r\u0131r\u0131q. Bir m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 var ki, u\u015fa\u011fa vaxt ay\u0131randa da qazanc azalacaq. Yax\u015f\u0131, bu \u00e7\u0131x\u0131lmaz v\u0259ziyy\u0259tin h\u0259ll d\u00fcsturu n\u0259dir?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bunlar bir b\u0259han\u0259 deyil ki, pul qazan\u0131ram dey\u0259, \u00f6vlad\u0131mla maraqlanmay\u0131m. G\u00fcn \u0259rzind\u0259 valideynl\u0259rin \u00f6vladlar\u0131na ay\u0131ra bil\u0259c\u0259k bo\u015f zamanlar\u0131 olur. Eyni zamanda da ev\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259n sonra ay\u0131racaq vaxt var. Valideynl\u0259r \u00f6vladlar\u0131n\u0131 dinl\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k, onun probleml\u0259rinin b\u00fct\u00fcn s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259rini ortaya \u00e7\u0131xara bil\u0259r. H\u0259r valideynin \u00f6z\u00fc bir psixoloqdur.<\/p>\n

D\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 olub ki, biz t\u0259hsil ocaqlar\u0131na m\u00fcraci\u0259t etmi\u015fik. El\u0259 m\u0259kt\u0259b direktorlar\u0131 olub ki, buna sevinibl\u0259r. El\u0259l\u0259ri d\u0259 olub ki, t\u0259hsil idar\u0259sinin icaz\u0259si olmadan bizi i\u00e7\u0259ri buraxa bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259kl\u0259rini deyibl\u0259r. Bir \u015feyi d\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131r ki, biz m\u0259kt\u0259bl\u0259rd\u0259 psixoloji seminarlar ke\u00e7m\u0259kl\u0259 hans\u0131sa t\u0259m\u0259nna g\u00fcdm\u00fcr\u00fck.<\/p>\n

– Televiziya verili\u015fl\u0259rinin, proqramlar\u0131n\u0131n d\u0259 format\u0131 g\u00fcn\u00fc-g\u00fcnd\u0259n d\u0259yi\u015fir. Multfilml\u0259rd\u0259 d\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n subliminal mesajlar \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcl\u00fcr v\u0259 bundan ba\u015fqa, u\u015faqlar erk\u0259n informasiya al\u0131rlar. Ya\u015f\u0131ndan \u0259vv\u0259l informasiya almaq c\u0259miyy\u0259t olaraq bizi inki\u015fafam\u0131 apar\u0131r?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Ya\u015f\u0131ndan \u0259vv\u0259l al\u0131nan informasiyan\u0131n m\u00fctl\u0259q \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 izah\u0131 laz\u0131md\u0131r. F\u0259rz ed\u0259k ki, u\u015faqlar m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n \u015feyl\u0259ri \u00f6yr\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259yirl\u0259r. G\u0259lin t\u0259hsild\u0259n n\u00fcmun\u0259 g\u0259tir\u0259k. Kurikulum sistemin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259, u\u015faq 6-c\u0131 sinifd\u0259 mayalanman\u0131n n\u0259d\u0259n ibar\u0259t olmas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259rsd\u0259 ke\u00e7ir. Ancaq onu d\u0259rk etmir. \u015eagirdin mayalanman\u0131 d\u0259rk etm\u0259si \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn h\u0259m valideyn, h\u0259m d\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llim o m\u00f6vzunun \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 \u00e7ox ciddi dayanmal\u0131d\u0131r. \u0130lk\u0259l cinsi terapiyan\u0131, cinsi t\u0259rbiy\u0259ni oradan ba\u015flamal\u0131d\u0131r. Cinsi t\u0259rbiy\u0259 dey\u0259rk\u0259n qara-qura \u015feyl\u0259r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259m\u0259liyik. Biz su i\u00e7\u0259rk\u0259n qara d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259 bil\u0259rikmi?! Xeyr. Su i\u00e7m\u0259k kimi cinsi terapiya da bir t\u0259l\u0259batd\u0131r. Biz bunu u\u015faqlara sa\u011flam \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rsaq v\u0259 \u00f6vladlarla sa\u011flam m\u00fcnasib\u0259tl\u0259r qurulsa, g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259kd\u0259 yaranacaq h\u0259r hans\u0131 problemin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 ala bil\u0259rik.<\/p>\n

Bu m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259d\u0259 bizim trendimiz SSR\u0130 zaman\u0131nda \u00e7\u0259kil\u0259n Az\u0259rbaycan filml\u0259ri olmal\u0131d\u0131r. O kinolarda g\u00f6z\u0259l t\u0259rbiy\u0259 d\u0259 verilir, valideyn\u0259 h\u00f6rm\u0259t d\u0259 a\u015f\u0131lan\u0131r. Sevgi m\u00fcnasib\u0259tl\u0259rinin qurulmas\u0131ndan tutmu\u015f, ictimai q\u0131na\u011fa q\u0259d\u0259r b\u00fct\u00fcn m\u00f6vzular\u0131 \u0259hat\u0259 ed\u0259n filml\u0259rimiz var. \u0130ctimai q\u0131naqlar h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 olub. Sad\u0259c\u0259 olaraq, indi informasiyan\u0131n bollu\u011fundan ictimai q\u0131naq b\u0259d\u0259nimiz\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f x\u0259r\u00e7\u0259ng kimi tez \u015fax\u0259l\u0259nir.<\/p>\n

– \u0130ctimai q\u0131naq b\u0259zi m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 \u00e7ox laz\u0131ml\u0131d\u0131r v\u0259 problemi aradan qald\u0131r\u0131r. Ancaq b\u0259zi m\u0259qamlarda problem, f\u0259lak\u0259t yarad\u0131r. Bu m\u0259nada nec\u0259 dey\u0259 bil\u0259rik ki, ictimai q\u0131naq h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 laz\u0131md\u0131r?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bizi c\u0259miyy\u0259tin m\u0259nfi a\u011fu\u015funa atan ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131za g\u0259l\u0259n hadis\u0259l\u0259r yox, bu hadis\u0259l\u0259rin \u0259traf\u0131nda olan dan\u0131\u015f\u0131qlar, dedi-qodulard\u0131r. Bel\u0259 bir deyim var – balacalar dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r, b\u00f6y\u00fckl\u0259r dan\u0131\u015f\u0131l\u0131r. Bu dan\u0131\u015f\u0131lmalar bizi h\u0259m da\u011f\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131na qald\u0131r\u0131r, h\u0259m d\u0259 da\u011f\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131ndan bir saniy\u0259d\u0259 yer\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131r, param-par\u00e7a edir. Art\u0131q biz bu \u00e7ilikl\u0259n\u0259n \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259ni emala da vers\u0259k, onun b\u0259rpas\u0131 uzun bir vaxt apar\u0131r. Biz itirm\u0259yi d\u0259 bacarm\u0131r\u0131q, b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yi d\u0259. \u00d6vladlar\u0131m\u0131za b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yi ba\u015fa salsaq, bu q\u0259d\u0259r \u00e7\u0259tinlik \u00e7\u0259km\u0259rik. Qar\u015f\u0131m\u0131za \u00e7\u0131xan mane\u0259l\u0259ri a\u015fmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn h\u0259m eqomuz, h\u0259m d\u0259 \u0259traf probleml\u0259r yarad\u0131r. Siz\u0259 bir misal \u00e7\u0259kim: son g\u00fcnl\u0259r 3 l\u00fct q\u0131z\u0131n videosu Az\u0259rbaycanda rezonans do\u011furdu. Hans\u0131 birimiz dedik ki, b\u0259lk\u0259 o q\u0131zlarla s\u00f6hb\u0259t ed\u0259k, onlar\u0131 do\u011fru yola \u00e7\u0259k\u0259k. Bunun \u0259v\u0259zin\u0259 ancaq q\u0131naqlar s\u0259sl\u0259ndi. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fcr\u00fck ki, ham\u0131 f\u0259rddir v\u0259 h\u0259r f\u0259rdin d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn bioloji x\u00fcsusiyy\u0259tl\u0259ri var.<\/p>\n

Problemin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 vaxt\u0131nda alm\u0131r\u0131q. G\u00f6zl\u0259yirik ki, n\u0259s\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131za g\u0259lsin, ondan sonra h\u0259r k\u0259s bizi danlas\u0131n. Bu zaman \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131q ki, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u0259 haqq qazand\u0131raq.<\/p>\n

– Abituriyenl\u0259r \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ali m\u0259kt\u0259bl\u0259r\u0259 q\u0259bul imtahanlar\u0131 ke\u00e7iril\u0259c\u0259k. \u018fn \u00e7ox psixoloji problem ya\u015fanan \u0259r\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rdir. Bu haqda da dan\u0131\u015fman\u0131z\u0131 ist\u0259rdim.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– O\u011flum imtahan verirdi, onu g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdik. Bir d\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fck ki, bir q\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcr\u0259yi getdi. Onu qucaqlad\u0131m, avtomobilim\u0259 apard\u0131m. M\u0259n\u0259 dedi ki, anas\u0131n\u0131n \u0259ziyy\u0259tini yer\u0259 sal\u0131b. Dem\u0259li, imtahan vaxt\u0131, suallar\u0131 cavabland\u0131r\u0131b. Yan\u0131ndak\u0131ndan n\u0259s\u0259 soru\u015fanda ka\u011f\u0131z yer\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb. Ka\u011f\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259rk\u0259n, i\u00e7\u0259ri gir\u0259n n\u0259zar\u0259t\u00e7i q\u0131z\u0131n haray\u0131na, yalvarma\u011f\u0131na baxmayaraq onu imtahandan qovub.<\/p>\n

Q\u0131z m\u0259n\u0259 “xala, m\u0259n n\u0259zar\u0259t\u00e7inin ayaqlar\u0131na y\u0131x\u0131ld\u0131m. Dedim ki, oxuyan u\u015fa\u011fam. Amma m\u0259ni imtahandan qovdu” dedi. N\u0259zar\u0259t\u00e7il\u0259r o q\u0131za k\u00f6m\u0259k ed\u0259 bilm\u0259zdimi? \u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 ki, ed\u0259 bil\u0259rdil\u0259r. Amma biz onu rahatl\u0131qla intihara y\u00f6n\u0259ldirik.<\/p>\n

– Siz dediyiniz i\u015fin \u0259xlaqi v\u0259 vicdan t\u0259r\u0259fidir. Amma m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259nin qanun v\u0259 intizam t\u0259r\u0259fi d\u0259 var. Siz\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lmirmi ki, qanun\u00a0 t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n d\u0259 n\u0259zar\u0259t\u00e7i vicdanl\u0131 davran\u0131b?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u018fn az\u0131ndan x\u0259b\u0259rdarl\u0131q edilm\u0259li idi ki, h\u0259min q\u0131z qaydalar\u0131 pozur. Bu x\u0259b\u0259rdarl\u0131q olmadan imtahan v\u0259r\u0259qini \u0259lind\u0259n almaq d\u00fczg\u00fcn deyil. Qayda-qanun m\u00fctl\u0259qdir, amma q\u0259bul imtahanlar\u0131nda n\u0259zar\u0259t\u00e7il\u0259ri d\u0259 psixoloq olmal\u0131d\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcni psixoloqlar ani \u015f\u0259raitd\u0259 yaranacaq stressin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 ala bilirl\u0259r.<\/p>\n

– Valideynl\u0259r ist\u0259yir ki, \u00f6vlad\u0131, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, H\u00fcquq fak\u00fclt\u0259sin\u0259 q\u0259bul olsun. Amma abituriyentin y\u0131\u011fd\u0131\u011f\u0131 bal az olur v\u0259 politologiyaya d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Bu zaman da valideynin deyinm\u0259sin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 u\u015faqlarda qorxu yaran\u0131r. \u0130ndi is\u0259 el\u0259 bir d\u00f6vrd\u00fcr ki, v\u0259zif\u0259d\u0259 olmadan da yax\u015f\u0131 pul qazanmaq olur. Niy\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 v\u0259zif\u0259y\u0259 meyllilik girovlu\u011fundan qurtula bilm\u0259mi\u015fik?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u00c7\u00fcnki biz \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz olma\u011f\u0131 bacarm\u0131r\u0131q. Biz publika \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn i\u015fl\u0259yirik. D\u0259rhal kimin n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259yini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fck.<\/p>\n

– M\u00f6vzunu d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259k. Ham\u0131m\u0131z f\u0259rd kimi at\u0131lmaq qorxusundan \u0259ziyy\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kirik. At\u0131lmaq qorxusu qad\u0131nlarda \u00e7oxdur, yoxsa ki\u015fil\u0259rd\u0259?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Q\u0131sqanc insanlarda daha \u00e7oxdur. \u0130nsan sevdiyini b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k ist\u0259mir, bu, q\u0131sqancl\u0131qd\u0131r. Amma bunun d\u0259rin sindromlar\u0131 t\u0259rk edilm\u0259k qorxusudur. Ki\u015fil\u0259rd\u0259 \u00e7ox olur, buna Otello sindromu deyirl\u0259r. \u00d6z\u00fcn\u0259, \u0259qid\u0259sin\u0259, m\u0259ntiqin\u0259, ruhi durumuna g\u00fcv\u0259n\u0259n bir ki\u015fi niy\u0259 d\u0259rin q\u0131sqancl\u0131q sindromu ya\u015famal\u0131d\u0131r? Biri var, desin ki, filan \u015feyi geyinm\u0259, ba\u015fqas\u0131n\u0131n baxmas\u0131n\u0131 ist\u0259mir\u0259m. Bu, ba\u015fad\u00fc\u015f\u00fcl\u0259ndir. Amma biri d\u0259 var ki, payla\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131 hissi d\u0259 q\u0131sqan\u0131r. “S\u0259n kimi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fcn ki, m\u0259n\u0259 bu istiliyi g\u00f6st\u0259rdin?” deyir. Bu, art\u0131q patalogiyad\u0131r, itirm\u0259k qorxusudur.<\/p>\n

Qad\u0131nlar\u0131n da i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 bel\u0259l\u0259ri var. Qad\u0131nlar var ki, evl\u0259rind\u0259 \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n h\u0259r \u015feyi edirl\u0259r. Amma \u0259ri ondan uzaqla\u015f\u0131r. B\u0259s niy\u0259 bel\u0259 olur? He\u00e7 kim d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fcr ki, ruhlar bir-birini tapmal\u0131d\u0131r. Ruhlar bir-birini tapmasa, m\u00fcmk\u00fcn deyil.<\/p>\n

– B\u0259s niy\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259tl\u0259rin say\u0131 \u00e7oxal\u0131b?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bax\u0131r\u0131q ki, kimins\u0259 anas\u0131 normald\u0131r. “Nec\u0259 ola bil\u0259r ki, anas\u0131 normal olan birinin bel\u0259 \u00f6vlad\u0131 olsun?”. Bu sual\u0131 veririk. Amma g\u0259lin baxaq g\u00f6r\u0259k, atas\u0131 normalm\u0131 olub? Ata qon\u015fu arvad\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcb, onun namusuna \u015f\u0259r atmamal\u0131d\u0131r. Qon\u015fu t\u0259k salam verib, g\u00fcl\u0259r \u00fczl\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131b, bu o dem\u0259k deyil ki, sabah onun haqq\u0131nda ba\u015fqa \u015feyl\u0259r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcls\u00fcn. H\u0259min bu x\u0259st\u0259 t\u0259f\u0259kk\u00fcr, onun \u0259xlaql\u0131 xan\u0131m\u0131n\u0131n olmas\u0131na baxmayaraq, c\u0259miyy\u0259t\u0259 \u0259xlaqs\u0131z q\u0131z\u0131 t\u0259qdim edir.<\/p>\n

– Alovlu sevgi n\u0259 zaman k\u00fcl\u0259 d\u00f6n\u00fcr?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Sevgi, a\u015fiq olmaq, \u00e7ox ist\u0259m\u0259k, ba\u011flanmaq tamamil\u0259 ayr\u0131-ayr\u0131 \u015feyl\u0259rdir. El\u0259l\u0259ri var ki, sad\u0259c\u0259 pafosla “sevir\u0259m” deyir. Amma i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 ba\u011fland\u0131\u011f\u0131 ba\u015fqa bir dostu da ola bilir. Bir d\u0259 bax\u0131r ki, ba\u011fland\u0131\u011f\u0131 dostuna a\u015fiq olub. B\u0259z\u0259n d\u0259 el\u0259 dost ola bil\u0259r ki, onu \u00e7ox ist\u0259yir v\u0259 he\u00e7 kiml\u0259 b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015f\u0259 bilmir. G\u0259lib sevdiyi q\u0131z v\u0259 ya o\u011flan haqda da ona dan\u0131\u015fanda, bax\u0131r ki, \u00e7ox ist\u0259m\u0259yin n\u0259tic\u0259sind\u0259 b\u0259y-g\u0259lin k\u00fcrs\u00fcs\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00f6zl\u0259ri oturub. Qar\u015f\u0131 t\u0259r\u0259f bu zaman d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr ki, dostu ona x\u0259yan\u0259t etdi.<\/p>\n

\u0130nsanlar dost olark\u0259n bir-birini dinl\u0259yir. Sevgili olanda, sev\u0259nd\u0259 is\u0259 bir-birini dinl\u0259mir, \u0259ksin\u0259 hirsl\u0259nir. “S\u0259n el\u0259s\u0259n, s\u0259n bel\u0259s\u0259n”, “s\u0259n vicdans\u0131zsan, g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn qaba\u011f\u0131nda ba\u015fqas\u0131na baxd\u0131n” deyirl\u0259r. Qar\u015f\u0131 t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259kini dinl\u0259m\u0259k ist\u0259mir. Bununla da effektiv \u00fcnsiyy\u0259tin olmamas\u0131 iki ba\u011f\u0131 bir-birind\u0259n uzaqla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131r v\u0259 m\u0259saf\u0259 verir.<\/p>\n

El\u0259 sevgil\u0259r var ki, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, biri Bak\u0131dad\u0131r, biri \u015e\u0259kid\u0259. Buna baxmayaraq sevgil\u0259rini o q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00f6z\u0259l qoruya bilirl\u0259r ki! Onlar bir-birin\u0259 dost kimi yana\u015faraq, hissl\u0259rini, probleml\u0259rini m\u0259saf\u0259d\u0259n b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015f\u0259 bilirl\u0259r. V\u0259 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn deyil ki, \u0259qid\u0259si olan bunu poza bilsin.<\/p>\n

Dey\u0259k ki, ki\u015fil\u0259rin t\u0259bi\u0259ti ba\u015fqa c\u00fcrd\u00fcr. El\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259bl\u0259r var ki, xan\u0131mlar ki\u015fil\u0259r\u0259 o “icaz\u0259ni” verir v\u0259 buna g\u00f6z yuma bilir. Amma bel\u0259 hal\u0131n qad\u0131nlarda olmas\u0131n\u0131 mental d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259, k\u0259narda saxlay\u0131r\u0131q.<\/p>\n

– Y\u0259ni, ki\u015finin x\u0259yan\u0259tin\u0259 haqq qazand\u0131rmaq olar?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259n x\u0259yan\u0259t\u0259 tamamil\u0259 “yox” deyir\u0259m. Haqq qazand\u0131rmaq olmaz. Sad\u0259c\u0259 olaraq o s\u00f6hb\u0259tin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 getm\u0259m\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131r. Tutaq ki, ki\u015fi Bak\u0131dad\u0131r, xan\u0131m\u0131 da uzun m\u00fcdd\u0259tdir ki, rayondad\u0131r. Qad\u0131n da, ki\u015fi d\u0259, sa\u011f\u0131nda v\u0259 solunda bir-birini g\u00f6rm\u0259yi bacarmal\u0131d\u0131r. X\u0259yan\u0259t h\u0259r k\u0259sin vicdan\u0131n\u0131n m\u0259hsuludur. H\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6z\u00fc q\u0259\u015f\u0259ng bilir ki, x\u0259yan\u0259t n\u0259dir. Ona qalsa, ki\u015fi d\u0259, qad\u0131n da g\u00f6z\u00fc il\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t edir. Bax\u0131b “bu n\u0259 q\u0259\u015f\u0259ng q\u0131zd\u0131r,” bu n\u0259 yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131, xarizmatik o\u011fland\u0131r” deyirl\u0259r. Bununla da h\u0259min adam\u0131 x\u0259yal\u0131nda canland\u0131r\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– Buna g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259, din g\u00f6z zinas\u0131n\u0131 da g\u00fcnah say\u0131r.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– B\u0259li, biz d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259y\u0259k ki, zina t\u0259kc\u0259 cinsi m\u00fcnasib\u0259tl\u0259rin qurulmas\u0131ndad\u0131r. B\u0259zi insan var ki, el\u0259 hey qar\u015f\u0131 cinsd\u0259n dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r, amma \u0259slind\u0259 he\u00e7 el\u0259 biri d\u0259 deyil. B\u0259z\u0259n ona pis bax\u0131rlar. Amma s\u00f6hb\u0259t ed\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcrl\u0259r ki, bu insan \u00f6z\u00fcd\u00fcr.<\/p>\n

– Adel sindromundan (el\u0259 aras\u0131nda sevgi x\u0259st\u0259liyi kimi tan\u0131n\u0131r) daha \u00e7ox hans\u0131 ya\u015fda olan insanlar \u0259ziyy\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kir?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Haz\u0131rda 35 ya\u015f kateqoriyas\u0131nda olan xan\u0131mlar v\u0259 b\u0259yl\u0259r bu sindromdan \u0259ziyy\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kirl\u0259r. Xan\u0131m olur ki, m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n ya\u015f\u0131 var, amma ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 e\u015fq d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tlidir. Art\u0131q onda \u0259s\u0259b, emosional stressl\u0259r yaran\u0131r. Bu emosionall\u0131\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 informativ stress d\u0259 t\u0259sir etm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flay\u0131r. N\u0259dir burada informativ stressl\u0259r? M\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, “vot\u00e7ap”da \u015f\u0259kill\u0259rini g\u00f6nd\u0259rm\u0259k, haqq\u0131nda m\u0259lumat verm\u0259k v\u0259 sair. Bel\u0259 informativ stressl\u0259ri ya\u015fayaraq onda emosional stressl\u0259r d\u0259 ba\u015f qald\u0131rma\u011fa ba\u015flay\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Emosional stressd\u0259 d\u0259 situasiya o d\u0259r\u0259c\u0259d\u0259 affekt\u0259 \u00e7evrilir ki, o, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 d\u0259, qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndak\u0131na da q\u0259sd ed\u0259 bil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

– B\u0259s Adel sindromundan nec\u0259 qurtulmaq olar?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u0130nsanlar \u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259 bu problemi g\u00f6r\u00fcb psixoloqa m\u00fcraci\u0259t edirl\u0259rs\u0259,\u00a0 m\u00fcxt\u0259lif terapiyalarla problemi h\u0259ll etm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131q. H\u0259ll yollar\u0131 m\u00fcxt\u0259lifdir v\u0259 \u00e7ox geni\u015f m\u00f6vzudur. H\u0259r temperamentin \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015fmaq t\u0259rzi var. Bu terapiyalarda psixoloq pasiyenti il\u0259 empatiya qurmal\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– Evli v\u0259 ya sevgilisi olan xan\u0131mlar, ki\u015fil\u0259r olur ki, problemi olark\u0259n \u0259ks cinsd\u0259n olan dostuna dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r.\u00a0 Bu m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259d\u0259 arvad\u0131 \u0259rd\u0259n, \u0259ri arvaddan, sevgilil\u0259ri bir-birind\u0259n ay\u0131ran n\u0259dir?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u018fr-arvad m\u00fcnasib\u0259tl\u0259ri t\u0259kc\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 pozulmur. El\u0259 insanlar var ki, m\u00fczakir\u0259 edirl\u0259r, probleml\u0259rini dinl\u0259yirl\u0259r. Bir insana g\u00fcnd\u0259 50 d\u0259n\u0259 sevgi mesaj\u0131 g\u0259l\u0259 bil\u0259r. Amma insan \u00f6z\u00fc d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259lidir ki, ham\u0131s\u0131na cavab vers\u0259, bu, onu hans\u0131 u\u00e7uruma apara bil\u0259r. H\u0259r bir qad\u0131n da, ki\u015fi d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 qada\u011falar, qaydalar, qanunlar qoymal\u0131d\u0131r. \u0130nsan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 bu qada\u011falar\u0131 qoyarsa, onun bir qorxusu yoxdur.<\/p>\n

– Ayt\u0259n xan\u0131m, s\u00f6hb\u0259t dost kimi bir-birini dinl\u0259m\u0259kd\u0259n gedir. G\u0259lin, ba\u015fqa misal \u00e7\u0259k\u0259k. Hans\u0131sa bir q\u0131z problemini anas\u0131na demir, gedib yax\u0131n bir r\u0259fiq\u0259sin\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r. Bu,\u00a0 o dem\u0259k deyil ki, anas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ox ist\u0259mir.<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Anan\u0131 \u00e7ox ist\u0259yir, amma ondan qorxur. Qorxu hissimiz imkan vermir ki, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz olaq. Q\u0131zlar\u0131m\u0131z \u0259g\u0259r ata il\u0259, qarda\u015fla dost olub b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yi bacarsalar, kims\u0259 onlar\u0131 rahatl\u0131qla b\u0259db\u0259xt ed\u0259 bilm\u0259z.<\/p>\n

– Sevm\u0259k insan\u0131\u00a0 daha \u00e7ox xo\u015fb\u0259xt edir, yoxsa sevilm\u0259k?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bel\u0259 bir ifad\u0259 var: ki\u015finin sevm\u0259y\u0259, qad\u0131n\u0131n is\u0259 sevilm\u0259y\u0259 ehtiyac\u0131 var. Ki\u015fi sev\u0259rk\u0259n, qad\u0131n is\u0259 sevil\u0259rk\u0259n xo\u015fb\u0259xt olur. B\u0259z\u0259n g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259n ki, qan\u0131 qara bir qad\u0131n yolda ged\u0259rk\u0259n t\u0259sad\u00fcf\u0259n deyil\u0259n bir s\u00f6zd\u0259n d\u0259rhal \u00fcz\u00fc g\u00fcl\u00fcr. \u00c7\u00fcnki o s\u00f6zl\u0259r\u0259 acd\u0131r. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr ki, onu g\u00fcld\u00fcr\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259b budur. \u018fslind\u0259 is\u0259 e\u015fitm\u0259k ist\u0259diyini e\u015fidir. H\u0259min vaxt onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn f\u0259rqi olmur ki, s\u00f6z\u00fc dey\u0259n xarakterc\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 uy\u011fun biridir ya yox!<\/p>\n

– Evli ki\u015fi v\u0259 ya qad\u0131n\u0131n da m\u00fcvafiq olaraq sevm\u0259y\u0259, sevilm\u0259y\u0259 ehtiyac\u0131 var?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u018frl\u0259-arvad aras\u0131nda m\u00fcnasib\u0259t d\u0259 var, \u00f6vlad da d\u00fcnyaya g\u0259lib. Amma ruh\u0259n bir deyill\u0259r. Ruh\u0259n bir olmad\u0131qda, qulaq yax\u015f\u0131 s\u00f6zl\u0259r\u0259 ac olur. Sevgi, a\u015fiqlik qeyri-ixtiyari bir h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259td\u0259n yaran\u0131r. Kinolarda da g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fck ki, qeyri-ixtiyari bax\u0131\u015fdan o\u011flanla q\u0131z bir-birin\u0259 a\u015fiq olur. B\u00fct\u00fcn sevgil\u0259rin motivind\u0259 t\u0259sad\u00fcf dayan\u0131r. Bu t\u0259sad\u00fcf q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131md\u0131r. Lakin insanlar ail\u0259 qurandan sonra bu q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131mlar\u0131 iflic etm\u0259lidirl\u0259r. \u00d6zl\u0259ri bunu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259lidirl\u0259r. Ail\u0259d\u0259 yola getmirs\u0259ns\u0259, ayr\u0131la bil\u0259rs\u0259n.<\/p>\n

– Xan\u0131mlar botoks, plastik \u0259m\u0259liyyatlar etdirirl\u0259r, bunun say\u0131 art\u0131b. Bu, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259nin statistik t\u0259r\u0259fidir. G\u0259lin psixoloji m\u0259qamlara toxunaq. Bax\u0131rsan, normal bir qad\u0131nd\u0131r, xarici g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015f\u00fc yerind\u0259dir, amma kompleks\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Buna g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259, m\u00fcxt\u0259lif \u0259m\u0259liyyatlar etdirir. Bunun alt\u0131nda yatan psixoloji faktorlar n\u0259l\u0259rdir?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u0130nsanlar\u0131n b\u0259d\u0259n qurulu\u015fu m\u00fcxt\u0259lifdir. M\u0259nim burnum bir az uzundur, indi n\u0259 etm\u0259liy\u0259m, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc \u00f6ld\u00fcrm\u0259liy\u0259m?! M\u0259n ba\u015fqa g\u00f6z\u0259llikl\u0259r tap\u0131b burun m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259sini d\u0259f edir\u0259m. K\u00fc\u00e7\u0259ni ged\u0259rk\u0259n bel\u0259 kimins\u0259 “Ayt\u0259nin burnu uzundur” dey\u0259 bil\u0259c\u0259yind\u0259n qorxmuram. Xan\u0131mlar gedib \u00e7\u0259tin \u0259m\u0259liyyata girirl\u0259r. N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 pullar\u0131 gedir. G\u0259lin baxaq g\u00f6r\u0259k, ham\u0131s\u0131 sonradan ideal v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259 olurmu? Xeyr. Bu yax\u0131nlarda m\u0259n klinikalar\u0131n birind\u0259 oldum. Xan\u0131mlardan biri \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc “90-60-90” etdirm\u0259k ist\u0259yirmi\u015f. Amma \u0259m\u0259liyyat\u0131 el\u0259 etmi\u015fdil\u0259r ki, d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tli simmetriya pozuntusu yaranm\u0131\u015fd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Psixoloji s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r\u0259 g\u0259linc\u0259, xan\u0131mlar plastik \u0259m\u0259liyyatlar\u0131 yen\u0259 \u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 etmirl\u0259r. Kims\u0259 \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b des\u0259 ki, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 edib, bu, yalan olar. Qad\u0131n kosmetikan\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 edir, bununla ruhu d\u00fcz\u0259nini tarazlay\u0131r. Orxan Kamal\u0131n m\u0259\u015fhur “Yad q\u0131z\u0131” \u0259s\u0259rini yada salaq. M\u0259zh\u0259r xan\u0131m\u0131ndan niy\u0259 ayr\u0131l\u0131r? Xan\u0131m\u0131 restoranda i\u00e7\u0259 bilm\u0259diyin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259. M\u0259zh\u0259r deyir ki, s\u0259n m\u0259ni biab\u0131r etdin. V\u0259 M\u0259zh\u0259r g\u0259lir Jal\u0259y\u0259 vurulur. Jal\u0259 obraz\u0131 onun ruhuna daha yax\u0131nd\u0131r. Q\u0131naya da bilm\u0259rik. \u0130ll\u0259r \u00f6nc\u0259 oxudu\u011fumuz \u0259s\u0259r g\u00f6r\u00fcn n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r aktuald\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Bu g\u00fcn h\u0259min M\u0259zh\u0259r b\u0259yl\u0259r a\u00e7\u0131q-a\u015fkar i\u015fl\u0259yir. Buna vaxta\u015f\u0131r\u0131 rast g\u0259linir. Ancaq bir m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259 var ki, ki\u015fil\u0259r art\u0131q Jal\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n iyr\u0259nirl\u0259r. \u00c7\u00fcnki bu Jal\u0259l\u0259r \u00f6zl\u0259ri deyil. N\u0259 burun, n\u0259 dodaq \u00f6zl\u0259rinindir. Sanki bir k\u00f6t\u00fckd\u00fcrl\u0259r.<\/p>\n

Bilirsiniz s\u0259hvimiz n\u0259dir? Biz qad\u0131nlar ki\u015fil\u0259ri yan\u0131m\u0131zda pul qab\u0131 kimi g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259yirik. Bel\u0259 olan halda ki\u015fil\u0259r d\u0259 qad\u0131nlar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 “uf, bunu n\u0259 otel\u0259 aparard\u0131m” dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. \u00c7\u00fcnki siqnallar bir-birin\u0259 \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcl\u00fcr. Qad\u0131n bax\u0131r ki, arxas\u0131nca bir o\u011flan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb, \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 “Gelandevagen”l\u0259. Qad\u0131n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fcr ki, bu ma\u015f\u0131n icar\u0259y\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcl\u00fcb ya yox. Qad\u0131n “bilirs\u0259n n\u0259 olmu\u015fdu, dal\u0131mca bir d\u0259n\u0259 “Gelandewagen” d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc” deyir. Deyir ki, t\u0259ki o o\u011flanla m\u00fcnasib\u0259ti d\u00fcz\u0259lsin, r\u0259fiq\u0259sin\u0259 h\u0259diyy\u0259 alacaq. Bu q\u0131z\u0131n i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 olan g\u00f6rm\u0259mi\u015f hissl\u0259ri ax\u0131rda ona g\u0259tirir ki, \u00f6z \u0259lind\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259 qalm\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– Ayt\u0259n xan\u0131m, cadunun real t\u0259siri varm\u0131?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u0130nsan\u0131n beynind\u0259, ruhunda, t\u0259f\u0259kk\u00fcr\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc inand\u0131rmas\u0131 olur. F\u0259rz ed\u0259k ki, birin\u0259 deyirik ki, s\u0259n Allah, m\u0259nim fal\u0131ma bax. O fala baxd\u0131rana q\u0259d\u0259r insan\u0131n g\u00fcnd\u0259lik h\u0259yat\u0131nda evd\u0259 s\u00f6z-s\u00f6hb\u0259ti d\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Adam gedir fala baxd\u0131r\u0131r, fal\u00e7\u0131 deyir ki, g\u00fcn\u00fcn ikinci yar\u0131s\u0131nda d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tli dava d\u00fc\u015f\u0259c\u0259k. \u0130nsan\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn probleml\u0259ri k\u0259narda qal\u0131r. Beynind\u0259 ancaq davan\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. Ev\u0259 g\u0259lir, h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131 \u015firin bir s\u00f6z dey\u0259nd\u0259 bel\u0259 dava sal\u0131r. Bu zaman d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr ki, fal\u00e7\u0131 d\u00fcz deyirmi\u015f. Fal\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131n, cadug\u0259rl\u0259rin evl\u0259rin\u0259, e\u015fikl\u0259rin\u0259 bax\u0131n. Sonunda etdikl\u0259ri d\u0259l\u0259duzluqlara g\u00f6r\u0259, ham\u0131s\u0131 \u0259ll\u0259rind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131x\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– Az\u0259rbaycan televiziya m\u0259kan\u0131nda d\u0259l\u0259duzlar varm\u0131?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Efirl\u0259rd\u0259 d\u0259l\u0259duzlar var. Ham\u0131m\u0131z da tan\u0131y\u0131r\u0131q. Adlar\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259k ist\u0259mir\u0259m, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259sinl\u0259r ki, onlarla g\u00fcnd\u0259m\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259k ist\u0259yirik. Bu, onlarda art\u0131q psixi bir sindromdur, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc b\u00f6y\u00fctm\u0259 hallar\u0131d\u0131r. Bu da \u015fizofreniyan\u0131n bir qoludur.<\/p>\n

– M\u00f6vzunu din-psixologiya m\u00f6vzusuna y\u00f6n\u0259ltm\u0259k ist\u0259yir\u0259m. B\u0259z\u0259n xo\u015f hissl\u0259r d\u0259, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k e\u015fqi insanlar\u0131 ba\u015f k\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259 bel\u0259 vadar edir. Bu da c\u0259nn\u0259t qorxusu. Bu m\u0259nada c\u0259nn\u0259t v\u0259 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m anlay\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda redakt\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 ehtiyac varm\u0131?\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259nim ilk ixtisas\u0131m iqtisad\u00e7\u0131-\u015f\u0259rq\u015f\u00fcnasl\u0131qd\u0131r. H\u0259min zamanlarda biz b\u0259la\u011f\u0259t f\u0259nnind\u0259 gedib otururduq. R\u0259hm\u0259tlik Malik Qarayev biz\u0259 t\u0259rc\u00fcm\u0259 n\u0259z\u0259riyy\u0259si v\u0259 Quran\u015f\u00fcnasl\u0131qdan d\u0259rs deyirdi. \u0130slam\u0131n modell\u0259\u015fm\u0259sind\u0259n is\u0259 Abdulla \u018fh\u0259dov d\u0259rs deyirdi. Bu d\u0259rsl\u0259rd\u0259 oturark\u0259n deyirdik ki, \u0130slam\u0131 qara g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fck. Deyirdik ki, buna g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 c\u0259nn\u0259ti bel\u0259 qara, qorxu kimi q\u0259bul edirik. O zamanlar m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259 bir sual vermi\u015fdim: “H\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n d\u0259 c\u0259nn\u0259t v\u0259 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m dey\u0259rk\u0259n, t\u0259f\u0259kk\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259 yaratd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z m\u0259qama hans\u0131 formada sar\u0131l\u0131r\u0131q?”. Biz \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc-d\u00f6rd\u00fcnc\u00fc kursda oxuyanda art\u0131q b\u0259zi xan\u0131mlar qapanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Qapanmaq qad\u0131n\u0131n bir cihad\u0131d\u0131r. Allah h\u0259r bir qad\u0131na qapanmaq hiday\u0259tini versin. \u00c7\u00fcnki dind\u0259 d\u0259 bildirilir ki, qad\u0131n n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r qapal\u0131 olarsa, bir o q\u0259d\u0259r maraql\u0131 olar.\u00a0 Amma bundan sui-istifad\u0259 etm\u0259k laz\u0131m deyil. Kims\u0259 c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn bunu edirs\u0259, d\u00fczg\u00fcn deyil. Ba\u015f\u0131a\u00e7\u0131q da c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259c\u0259k \u015f\u0259xsl\u0259r var. He\u00e7 kimin qeyb\u0259tini etm\u0259d\u0259n, kimins\u0259 haqq\u0131n\u0131 yem\u0259d\u0259n, h\u0259r k\u0259si psixoloji olaraq bir f\u0259rd kimi g\u00f6rs\u0259k, g\u00fcnah etm\u0259rik. Bu formada yana\u015fsaq, siz dediyiniz din sevgisini qorxu il\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131b cahil h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259tl\u0259r etm\u0259rik.<\/p>\n

– \u00dcmumiyy\u0259tl\u0259, c\u0259nn\u0259t v\u0259 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259min realda m\u00f6vcud olmas\u0131na inan\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bilmir\u0259m c\u0259miyy\u0259t m\u0259ni hans\u0131 formada q\u0259bul ed\u0259r. M\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn c\u0259nn\u0259tin d\u0259, c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259min d\u0259 reall\u0131\u011f\u0131 ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z h\u0259yat t\u0259rzidir. \u0130nsan ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u0259yat t\u0259rzi il\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn c\u0259nn\u0259t\u0259 d\u0259 ata bil\u0259r, c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m\u0259 d\u0259. C\u0259nn\u0259t d\u0259, c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m d\u0259 h\u0259r k\u0259sin \u00f6z d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259sind\u0259dir. He\u00e7 birimiz \u00f6l\u00fcb dirilm\u0259mi\u015fik. Bunlar ham\u0131s\u0131 m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn f\u0259rziyy\u0259l\u0259rdir. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 yanl\u0131\u015f d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m.<\/p>\n

Amma siz\u0259 bir m\u0259qam\u0131 da deyim. Ail\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259rl\u0259rini bilm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn biz\u0259 m\u00fcs\u0259lman h\u00fcququ d\u0259rsi ke\u00e7ilirdi. Bizim g\u00f6z\u0259l dinimizd\u0259 qad\u0131n\u0131n v\u0259 ki\u015finin h\u00fcquqlar\u0131n\u0131 qorunmas\u0131 t\u0259sbit olunub. \u0130slamda bo\u015fanan qad\u0131n 3 aydan sonra ba\u015fqas\u0131 il\u0259 ail\u0259 qura bil\u0259r. O da b\u0259llidir ki, niy\u0259 m\u0259hz 3 ay deyilib. \u00c7\u00fcnki b\u0259tnind\u0259 u\u015faq ola bil\u0259r. Bizim dinimiz bunu deyirs\u0259, niy\u0259 c\u0259miyy\u0259timiz bo\u015fanan qad\u0131n\u0131n \u0259r\u0259 getm\u0259sini q\u0131nay\u0131r?! \u018fg\u0259r dind\u0259n dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131qsa, b\u0259s dind\u0259 olanlara niy\u0259 qiym\u0259t vermirik?! Niy\u0259 o\u011flanlar\u0131m\u0131z d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr ki, bo\u015fanan qad\u0131n\u0131 almaram. N\u0259y\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259, g\u0259nc q\u0131zlar\u0131m\u0131z ail\u0259 qurmam\u0131\u015f \u00f6z l\u0259yaq\u0259tl\u0259ri olan bir m\u0259qam\u0131 itirirl\u0259r, sonra da hans\u0131sa a\u011f\u0131ll\u0131, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcv\u0259n\u0259n bir o\u011flan\u0131 aldad\u0131b \u0259r\u0259 gedirl\u0259r.<\/p>\n

H\u0259r hans\u0131 q\u0131z yeniyetm\u0259likd\u0259 valideyn diqq\u0259tsizliyind\u0259n, m\u00fc\u0259llim-m\u0259kt\u0259b diqq\u0259tsizliyind\u0259n bir s\u0259hv ed\u0259 bil\u0259r. \u018fn \u00e7ox burada m\u0259kt\u0259b psixoloqunun \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 m\u0259suliyy\u0259t d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Hans\u0131sa bir direktoru q\u0131namaq laz\u0131m deyil. M\u0259kt\u0259b psixoloqu h\u0259r u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n ail\u0259 daxilind\u0259ki probleml\u0259rini bilm\u0259lidir.<\/p>\n

– Filosof A\u011falar M\u0259mm\u0259dovun “\u018fr\u0259bl\u0259rin c\u0259nn\u0259ti” adl\u0131 bir m\u0259qal\u0259si var. O yaz\u0131r ki, c\u0259nn\u0259t v\u0259 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m anlay\u0131\u015flar\u0131 \u0259r\u0259bl\u0259rin t\u0259bi\u0259t\u0259 verdiyi reaksiyad\u0131r.\u00a0 \u00a0Y\u0259ni, \u0259r\u0259bl\u0259r g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259dikl\u0259rini, arzulad\u0131qlar\u0131n\u0131 c\u0259nn\u0259t ad\u0131 il\u0259 assosiasiya edibl\u0259r, c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m is\u0259 onlar\u0131n ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7\u0259tin h\u0259yat t\u0259rzinin yaratd\u0131\u011f\u0131 t\u0259\u0259ss\u00fcrat idi.\u00a0 Bu haqda n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259ksiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– C\u0259nn\u0259t v\u0259 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m insanlar\u0131n \u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 inand\u0131rmaq ist\u0259dikl\u0259ri x\u0259yali al\u0259ml\u0259rdir. Hac\u0131 \u015eahin\u0259 qulaq asark\u0259n adam deyir: “Ay Allah, m\u0259ni g\u00fcnahlardan uzaqla\u015fd\u0131r, t\u00f6vb\u0259y\u0259 do\u011fru gedim”. Ancaq el\u0259 din xadimi d\u0259 var ki, nec\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rsa, adam qorxudan qulaqlar\u0131n\u0131 tutur. \u0130nsanlar\u0131 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259ml\u0259 qorxudurlar. Ne\u00e7\u0259 bipolyar pozuntulu insanlar var ki, ham\u0131s\u0131 bel\u0259 qorxudan yaran\u0131b. Ay\u0131landan sonra is\u0259 deyibl\u0259r ki, namazdan da, kitabdan da uzaq olacaq. Deyir\u0259m ki, m\u0259ni g\u00fcnaha bat\u0131rmas\u0131nlar, sad\u0259c\u0259 sa\u011flam t\u0259f\u0259kk\u00fcrl\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcns\u00fcnl\u0259r.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Psixoloq Ayt\u0259n \u018fl\u0259kb\u0259rova Modern.az sayt\u0131na geni\u015f m\u00fcsahib\u0259 verib. ARANTV.AZ h\u0259min m\u00fcsahib\u0259ni oxuculara t\u0259qdim edir:\u00a0 – Ayt\u0259n xan\u0131m, son g\u00fcnl\u0259rin \u0259n \u00e7ox m\u00fczakir\u0259 olunan m\u00f6vzular\u0131ndan biri intiharlard\u0131r.\u00a0 \u0130nsanlar\u0131 intiharlara s\u00fcr\u00fckl\u0259y\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r \u00e7oxdur. Zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259, texnologiya inki\u015faf etdikc\u0259, insanlar da sanki irad\u0259sizl\u0259\u015fir. Texnolji inki\u015faf\u0131n paralelind\u0259 bizi intihara t\u0259\u015fviq ed\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r n\u0259dir?\u00a0 – Haz\u0131rda s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259n \u0259sas\u0131 stressl\u0259rdir. Bu stressl\u0259rin i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 biz\u0259 dayanmadan t\u0259sir ed\u0259ni informativ stressl\u0259rdir. \u0130nformativ stressl\u0259rin yaranmas\u0131 insanlar\u0131 intihara apar\u0131r. \u0130ndi v\u0259ziyy\u0259t el\u0259dir ki, insanlar intiharla sanki “qa\u00e7d\u0131-tutdu” oynay\u0131rlar. B\u0259zil\u0259ri asanl\u0131qla tap\u0131lma\u011f\u0131, \u00f6l\u00fcml\u0259ri il\u0259 g\u00fcnd\u0259m\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259yi d\u0259 ist\u0259yirl\u0259r. \u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259nl\u0259r…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":51644,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"gutentor_comment":0,"rttpg_featured_image_url":{"full":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false],"landscape":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false],"portraits":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false],"thumbnail":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3-150x150.jpg",150,150,true],"medium":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3-300x225.jpg",300,225,true],"large":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",640,480,false],"1536x1536":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false],"2048x2048":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false],"post-thumbnail":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3-240x172.jpg",240,172,true],"advps-thumb-one":["https:\/\/arantv.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/aytenelekberovapsixoloq3.jpg",800,600,false]},"rttpg_author":{"display_name":"V\u00fcsal Rafiqo\u011flu","author_link":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/?author=2"},"rttpg_comment":0,"rttpg_category":"C\u0259miyy\u0259t<\/a>","rttpg_excerpt":"Psixoloq Ayt\u0259n \u018fl\u0259kb\u0259rova Modern.az sayt\u0131na geni\u015f m\u00fcsahib\u0259 verib. ARANTV.AZ h\u0259min m\u00fcsahib\u0259ni oxuculara t\u0259qdim edir:\u00a0 – Ayt\u0259n xan\u0131m, son g\u00fcnl\u0259rin \u0259n \u00e7ox m\u00fczakir\u0259 olunan m\u00f6vzular\u0131ndan biri intiharlard\u0131r.\u00a0 \u0130nsanlar\u0131 intiharlara s\u00fcr\u00fckl\u0259y\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r \u00e7oxdur. Zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259, texnologiya inki\u015faf etdikc\u0259, insanlar da sanki irad\u0259sizl\u0259\u015fir. Texnolji inki\u015faf\u0131n paralelind\u0259 bizi intihara t\u0259\u015fviq ed\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259r n\u0259dir?\u00a0 – Haz\u0131rda s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259n \u0259sas\u0131 stressl\u0259rdir.…","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51643"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=51643"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51643\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/51644"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=51643"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=51643"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/arantv.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=51643"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}