– Niy\u0259 deyinirs\u0259n, n\u0259 olub?<\/p>\n
Bo\u011faz\u0131ndan s\u00fcrt\u00fcn\u0259-s\u00fcrt\u00fcn\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xan x\u0131r\u0131lt\u0131l\u0131 s\u0259sl\u0259 cavab verir:<\/p>\n
– G\u00f6rm\u00fcrs\u0259n, can\u0131m a\u011fr\u0131y\u0131r?! 30 ildir k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259y\u0259m. Adam n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 betonun, da\u015f\u0131n, skamyalar\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 yatar?!<\/p>\n
– Evin yoxdur ki?
\n– (Hikk\u0259 il\u0259) \u0130ndi yoxdur da, amma vaxt\u0131nda olub. Vaxtil\u0259 evim d\u0259 olub, ail\u0259m d\u0259. Amma indi he\u00e7 n\u0259yim yoxdur. X\u0259st\u0259 can\u0131mla g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fc k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 yubad\u0131ram. N\u0259 vaxtsa \u00f6l\u0259c\u0259yimi g\u00f6zl\u0259yir\u0259m (k\u00f6vr\u0259lir- red.).<\/p>\n
– Evini, ail\u0259ni niy\u0259 itirdin ki?<\/p>\n
Sual\u0131mdan sonra xeyli \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 bax\u0131b susdu. Sonra onu niy\u0259 sor\u011fu-suala tutma\u011f\u0131m\u0131n s\u0259b\u0259bini \u00f6yr\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259di. M\u0259ns\u0259 k\u0259nardan diqq\u0259timi \u00e7\u0259kdiyini v\u0259 h\u0259ms\u00f6hb\u0259t olmaq ist\u0259yimi bildirdim. O is\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 yell\u0259yib s\u00f6hb\u0259t\u0259 davam etdi:<\/p>\n
– Ail\u0259mizin sonbe\u015fik \u00f6vlad\u0131 olmu\u015fam. Atam\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcnd\u0259n sonra anam bizi min bir \u0259ziyy\u0259tl\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fctd\u00fc. M\u0259n he\u00e7 anama da layiqli \u00f6vlad ola bilm\u0259dim (k\u00f6vr\u0259lir). Anam o biri qarda\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 evl\u0259ndirib yerb\u0259yer el\u0259di. S\u0131ra m\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7atanda anam yor\u011fan-d\u00f6\u015f\u0259y\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc. Ancaq m\u0259n\u0259 “evl\u0259n”,- deyirdi. M\u0259nim\u00e7\u00fcn bir q\u0131z da b\u0259y\u0259nmi\u015fdi. Amma m\u0259n \u00f6z bildiyimi etdim. Anam\u0131n dediyi q\u0131z\u0131 yox, \u00f6z se\u00e7diyimi ald\u0131m. El\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey d\u0259 bundan ba\u015flad\u0131.<\/p>\n
Bir q\u0259d\u0259r susdu… Ancaq m\u0259n s\u00f6hb\u0259td\u0259n yay\u0131nmadan sual verdim:<\/p>\n
– N\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131 ki?<\/p>\n
Deyin\u0259-deyin\u0259 cavab verdi:<\/p>\n
– Ata yurdum C\u0259lilabaddad\u0131r. Anam m\u0259n\u0259 \u018fl\u0259t q\u0259s\u0259b\u0259sind\u0259n ev ald\u0131. El\u0259 oldu ki, anam bir m\u00fcdd\u0259tlik m\u0259niml\u0259 ya\u015fad\u0131. Q\u0131z anam\u0131 yola verm\u0259di. H\u0259r g\u00fcn i\u015fd\u0259n yor\u011fun g\u0259lirdim. G\u0259l\u0259n kimi d\u0259 yolda\u015f\u0131m he\u00e7 n\u0259d\u0259n ev\u0259 q\u0131r\u011f\u0131n sal\u0131rd\u0131. Anama g\u00f6r\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259 dey\u0259 bilmirdim, m\u0259cbur qal\u0131b onun q\u0131r\u011f\u0131n\u0131na qulaq as\u0131rd\u0131m. Anam \u00e7ox sakit qad\u0131n idi, yolda\u015f\u0131m ancaq h\u0259yas\u0131z idi. Bilirs\u0259n, anamla niy\u0259 yola getmirdi?<\/p>\n
– Yox, bilmir\u0259m, des\u0259n bil\u0259r\u0259m…
\n– Anam t\u0259mizkar qad\u0131n idi, q\u0131z pinti idi. El\u0259 g\u00fcn olurdu ki, bizim yerimizi d\u0259 anam y\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. Uzun s\u00f6z\u00fcn q\u0131sas\u0131, dava-q\u0131r\u011f\u0131nlarla bir o\u011flum, bir q\u0131z\u0131m oldu. U\u015faqlar olandan sonra anam C\u0259lilabada qay\u0131td\u0131. Anam bizd\u0259 olanda u\u015faqlar\u0131ma da bax\u0131rd\u0131. Yolda\u015f\u0131m h\u0259m h\u0259yas\u0131z idi. h\u0259m d\u0259 \u00e7ox bezdiridi m\u0259ni. M\u0259nim qula\u011f\u0131m\u0131 “doldururdu ki”, anan\u0131 sayma, biz\u0259 g\u0259lib getm\u0259sin. Ancaq m\u0259n onun he\u00e7 bir s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 m\u0259h\u0259l qoymurdum. Oda bundan q\u0131c\u0131qlan\u0131rd\u0131, el\u0259 bil anam\u0131n r\u0259hm\u0259t\u0259 getm\u0259sini g\u00f6zl\u0259yirmi\u015f. El\u0259 anam r\u0259hm\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259n sonra yolda\u015f\u0131m yolunu azd\u0131. \u018fvv\u0259l-\u0259vv\u0259l he\u00e7 n\u0259 bilmirdim, ancaq yen\u0259 d\u0259 davalar\u0131m\u0131z \u0259skilm\u0259di. \u018fksin\u0259 daha da \u015fidd\u0259tl\u0259ndi. Art\u0131q s\u00f6z-s\u00f6hb\u0259td\u0259n bezmi\u015fdim. Yax\u015f\u0131 yerd\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259yirdim, yax\u015f\u0131 maa\u015f al\u0131rd\u0131m. Arvad\u0131m el\u0259 qudurmu\u015fdu ki, \u00f6z\u00fc g\u00fcnd\u0259 bir paltar geyinirdi. Amma m\u0259nim pal-paltar\u0131m\u0131 yumurdu. \u0130\u015fd\u0259n yor\u011fun g\u0259lirdim Allah\u0131n bir st\u0259kan \u00e7ay\u0131n\u0131 da vermirdi. Bir s\u00f6zl\u0259 m\u0259ni ki\u015fi kimi saym\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n
– Deyirs\u0259n ki, anam r\u0259hm\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259n sonra yol\u015fad\u0131m yolunu azd\u0131…
\n– (\u018fs\u0259bl\u0259) H\u0259\u0259\u0259… d\u00fcz deyir\u0259m d\u0259. Anamdan sonra yolda\u015f\u0131m\u0131n haqq\u0131nda m\u0259hl\u0259d\u0259 art\u0131q-\u0259ksik s\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259r g\u0259zdi. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 susdum, iki d\u0259f\u0259 susdum, ax\u0131r\u0131 d\u00f6z\u0259 bilm\u0259dim. Ayd\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rmaq ist\u0259dim, ax\u0131 m\u0259n ki\u015fiy\u0259m. D\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 evd\u0259 s\u00f6z a\u00e7anda h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259ki kimi s\u0259sini ba\u015f\u0131na at\u0131b ecv\u0259 s\u00f6z-s\u00f6hb\u0259t sal\u0131rd\u0131. M\u0259nd\u0259 bezib evd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131m. Bir g\u00fcn d\u0259 qon\u015fuda ya\u015fl\u0131 qad\u0131n vard\u0131, m\u0259n i\u015fd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 qar\u015f\u0131m\u0131 k\u0259sdir. Xeyli s\u00f6hb\u0259td\u0259n sonra m\u0259n\u0259 dedi ki, “o\u011ful, arvad\u0131n\u0131 y\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fd\u0131r! El\u0259sind\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 arvad olmaz, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 bir yol se\u00e7”. Bu s\u00f6z h\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7ox pis t\u0259sir etd\u0131 v\u0259 s\u0259b\u0259bini soru\u015fdum. Qoca da dedi ki, “s\u0259n i\u015fd\u0259 olursan, he\u00e7 n\u0259d\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rin olmur. Arvad\u0131n m\u0259hl\u0259d\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 qon\u015fu ki\u015fi il\u0259 intim m\u00fcnasib\u0259td\u0259 olub”. Qocan\u0131n bu s\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259n sonra el\u0259 bildim ba\u015f\u0131mdan qaynar su t\u00f6kd\u00fcl\u0259r. \u018fs\u0259bn\u0259n ev\u0259 girib bu s\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259r\u0259 son qoymaq ist\u0259dim. N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r \u0259s\u0259bi olsam da, u\u015faqlara g\u00f6r\u0259 dava-dala\u015f salmad\u0131m. Sakitc\u0259 yolda\u015f\u0131m\u0131 ba\u015fqa ota\u011fa \u00e7\u0259kib, qocan\u0131n dedikl\u0259rini \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n soru\u015fdum. Ars\u0131z-ars\u0131z \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 t\u0259sdiq el\u0259di. H\u0259tta art\u0131q \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 ba\u015fqa bir ki\u015fi tapd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 da dedi. \u018fvv\u0259l inanmad\u0131m, yerimd\u0259 duruxub qald\u0131m. Sonra d\u0259li oldum, onu m\u00f6hk\u0259m d\u00f6yd\u00fcm. H\u0259l\u0259 az qala \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259c\u0259kdim. H\u0259min g\u00fcn ev\u0259 polis \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131b m\u0259nd\u0259n izahat ald\u0131rd\u0131 v\u0259 bir daha onlara yax\u0131nla\u015fmayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 t\u0259l\u0259b etdi. Polisd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b s\u0259h\u0259ri g\u00fcn\u00fc i\u015f\u0259 getdim v\u0259 m\u00fcdir\u0259 i\u015fd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xmaq ist\u0259diyimi bildirdim. M\u00fcdir dostum idi, \u0259vv\u0259lc\u0259 raz\u0131la\u015fmad\u0131. Ancaq israrla getm\u0259k ist\u0259diyimi bildirdim. N\u0259s\u0259, sa\u011folla\u015f\u0131b birba\u015fa hava liman\u0131na getdim. Az\u0259rbaycandan ba\u015f g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb Rusiyaya getdim.
\n– He\u00e7 \u00f6vladlar\u0131nla maraqland\u0131nm\u0131 v\u0259 ya onlar s\u0259ni axtard\u0131m\u0131?
\n– Yox… n\u0259 onlar m\u0259ni axtard\u0131, n\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259n onlara t\u0259r\u0259f getdim. \u00c7\u00fcnki polisd\u0259 bir daha onlara yax\u0131nla\u015fmayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 yazm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m.<\/p>\n
\u00d6vladlar\u0131ndan dan\u0131\u015fark\u0259n k\u00f6vr\u0259ldi v\u0259 d\u0259rind\u0259n ah \u00e7\u0259kdi. M\u0259ns\u0259 pis oldu\u011funu g\u00f6r\u00fcb m\u00f6vzunu d\u0259yi\u015fdim:<\/p>\n
– B\u0259s, nec\u0259 oldu Az\u0259rbaycana qay\u0131td\u0131n?
\n– Ka\u015f ki, qay\u0131tmazd\u0131m. Ka\u015f\u2026 (heyfsl\u0259nir- red.). He\u00e7 qarda\u015flar\u0131m da m\u0259n\u0259 sahib \u00e7\u0131xmad\u0131. Hans\u0131n\u0131n qap\u0131s\u0131na getdim, burnumun \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259n vurub qovdular m\u0259ni (k\u00f6vr\u0259lir- red.). O g\u00fcnd\u0259n k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 qal\u0131ram. Gec\u0259l\u0259r zibillikl\u0259rd\u0259 e\u015f\u0259l\u0259nir, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 yem\u0259k axtar\u0131rd\u0131m. Arada kimins\u0259 yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 ya pul verir, ya da h\u0259y\u0259tind\u0259 i\u015f g\u00f6rd\u00fcr\u00fcb bir qar\u0131n yem\u0259k verir. \u0130ndi d\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcn kimi h\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n bir siqaret, ya da bir qar\u0131n yem\u0259yin pulunu dil\u0259nir\u0259m. \u018fvv\u0259lc\u0259 utan\u0131rd\u0131m, art\u0131q \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fdim. D\u00fcz 30 il\u0259 yax\u0131nd\u0131r ki, k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259y\u0259m.
\n![\""Arvad\u0131m](\"https:\/\/upload.az\/foto\/arxiv\/59650009_1174138772755777_18386048085508.jpg\")
<\/p>\n
G\u00f6zl\u0259ri doldu, axan ya\u015flar\u0131 qolu il\u0259 silib davam etdi:<\/p>\n
– B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 anam m\u0259ni bel\u0259 g\u00f6rs\u0259ydi \u00fcr\u0259yi partlayard\u0131. Qarda\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 da, yolda\u015f\u0131m\u0131 da yerin\u0259 oturdard\u0131. Bir k\u00f6p\u0259k q\u0131z\u0131 ax\u0131r\u0131m\u0131za \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131 da.<\/p>\n
– B\u0259s indi harda qal\u0131rsan?
\n– Burda (S\u0259m\u0259d Vur\u011fun park\u0131nda- red.). Parklarda, tinl\u0259rd\u0259 yatmaqdan bezmi\u015f\u0259m. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcl kimi yer tapm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m, o da \u0259limd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131. Ba\u015f\u0131ma i\u015f g\u0259ldi, daha qorxumdan ora getmir\u0259m. Dem\u0259k, bir d\u0259f\u0259 gec\u0259l\u0259diyim yer\u0259 bir c\u00fctl\u00fck g\u0259ldi. Yerl\u0259rinin olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 v\u0259 m\u0259niml\u0259 gec\u0259l\u0259m\u0259k ist\u0259dikl\u0259rini bildirdil\u0259r. M\u0259nd\u0259 etiraz etm\u0259yib h\u0259tta h\u0259ms\u00f6hb\u0259t oldum. H\u0259m d\u0259 h\u0259min g\u00fcn yax\u015f\u0131 pul dil\u0259nmi\u015fdim. Onlar da s\u00f6hb\u0259t ed\u0259-ed\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131b-g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r, h\u0259tta m\u0259n\u0259 siqaret d\u0259 verdil\u0259r. M\u0259nd\u0259 cibimd\u0259n pullar\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131b o\u011flana uzatd\u0131m ki, ac qalmayaq. Gedib bazarl\u0131q el\u0259sin. Bir gec\u0259lik d\u0259 olsa oturub \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k yey\u0259k. O\u011flan getdi v\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259qiq\u0259d\u0259n sonra q\u0131za z\u0259ng g\u0259ldi. Q\u0131z durub ged\u0259nd\u0259 dedi ki, “a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb qay\u0131d\u0131ram”. Xeyli g\u00f6zl\u0259dim, he\u00e7 biri qay\u0131tmad\u0131. \u0130t d\u0259 getdi, ip d\u0259. S\u0259n dem\u0259, bunlar normal adam deyilmi\u015fl\u0259r, narkoman imi\u015fl\u0259r. \u00c7\u00fcnki o m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259d\u0259n sonra onlar h\u0259r ge\u00e7\u0259 m\u0259ni g\u00fcd\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r. M\u0259n yatan kimi y\u0131\u011fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m pullar\u0131 cibimd\u0259n g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131lar. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 d\u0259 gec\u0259nin bir al\u0259mi bunlar qald\u0131\u011f\u0131m yer\u0259 g\u0259ldil\u0259r. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc yalandan yatm\u0131\u015f kimi g\u00f6st\u0259rdim. Q\u0131z \u0259lini cibim\u0259 salanda, \u0259lind\u0259n tutdum. O\u011flan tez \u00fcst\u00fcm\u0259 qa\u00e7d\u0131. Yad\u0131mda qalan odur ki, a\u011fz\u0131m\u0131 tutub, boynumu qoltu\u011funa s\u0131xd\u0131. V\u0259 q\u0131za dedi ki, “\u015falvar\u0131n\u0131 soyundur, g\u00f6t\u00fcr qa\u00e7”. Bilirsiniz, onlar m\u0259ni l\u00fct qoydular. Ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn camaat aras\u0131na \u00e7\u0131xa bilm\u0259dim (a\u011flay\u0131r- red.) Bundan sonra ancaq \u00f6l\u00fcm ist\u0259yir\u0259m.<\/p>\n
S\u00f6hb\u0259tini bitirib, \u0259lind\u0259ki siqaret k\u00f6t\u00fckl\u0259rini bir-bir yand\u0131r\u0131b \u00e7\u0259km\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131. Bizs\u0259 sakitc\u0259 onun yan\u0131ndan durub uzaqla\u015fd\u0131q. Arxam\u0131zca, “siz d\u0259 he\u00e7 bilm\u0259diniz m\u0259n kim\u0259m! Tez-tez g\u0259lin haaa”, – s\u0259sl\u0259ndi.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
G\u00fcnorta vaxt\u0131 yolumu S\u0259m\u0259d Vur\u011fun park\u0131ndan sald\u0131m. \u018ftrafda xeyli insanlar vard\u0131. \u018fvv\u0259lc\u0259 parka g\u00f6z g\u0259zdirdim. Daha sonra skamyada oturub zar\u0131ya-zar\u0131ya \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 n\u0259s\u0259 deyin\u0259n ki\u015fi diqq\u0259timi \u00e7\u0259kdi. Q\u0259hv\u0259yi g\u00f6zl\u0259ri, a\u011f b\u0259nizi, \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fck di\u015fl\u0259ri v\u0259 uzun saqqal\u0131 vard\u0131. Qara geyimi toz v\u0259 \u00e7irkd\u0259n a\u011fappaq idi. \u018fsl\u0259n C\u0259lilabad rayonundan olan 58 ya\u015fl\u0131 \u018fl\u0259sg\u0259r ki\u015fi (ad \u015f\u0259rtidir- red.), ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":55310,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-55309","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cmiyyt"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t